We Can Not Stomach Infinity 1. I was looking through the curling fence Imaging white pickets, or off white Not unlike your undies, not off you, as you lay there. I was trying to see what was being said The tattle tale sun made light through the blinds Into bars across you slanting in recline crossing the bed Making me throw my hands over head to grasp At the brass shaking a sigh into a swallowed moan I was trying to read this. To read this: "I was trying to say" ... What did you say? Your panties stayed so white and confused ... I peered through lids to see your mouth About a world I missed out on In mine only marbles I could not see you up a tree or even grasping Enough brass to swallow the moon I could not decipher the ache of stones Or imagine you alone with death I could not turn light off or put out sun Or part bars, unfurl rays, unbraid the lines I tried to close my eyes but the bright beat me And gulped me into everything unfocused The book grew heavy on me and I failed to follow I let go, let it drop, and dropped off 2. I had a dream and you were in it And you were crying and trying to say I could not see you as you were As you went away What is that cruelty they say? All in good time, as if, all and only Could be so lovely, as you Owning your lonely In a room with empty windows I saw the table and the piece of paper White and off white and off it I tried To read there the reason why you were crying 3. I woke up confused your panties so white Your mouth moving obscured by strands of hair Furious pale across the lacerating rays You reading while I could not read your face I had lost my place and could not parse the track Not cutting the in from the out, the light from glare I tried to say and failed the trial and could not Unfold or fathom or read when from where 4. Into my dream the devil came Swirling about my head But I saw his makeup I saw his makeup I saw eye shadow and his time line His desperate unfolding putting pebbles in a line Each pebble a whimper adding to his fury But I saw his makeup I saw his makeup 5. I swallowed warm air and peace of interior, tried. Tried ... to make you out. Your panties not off, you, not Off the bed I couldn't recall what the piece of paper said I opened the page and read out loud "I was trying to say" And then you wiped enough hair from your face And the light fell away and I saw in a moment The world in your mouth and a sky in your eyes And I knew in your smile why you cried and I read Spitting marble pieces onto the bed, the paper, the one In my dreams, and here now is what it said We can not stomach infinity.